Movie Review: Rolling Thunder (1977)

Genre: Revenge Action Drama  

Director: John Flynn  

Starring: William Devane, Tommy Lee Jones, Linda Haynes, Dabney Coleman  

Running Time: 100 minutes  

Synopsis: It's 1973, and U.S. Air Force Major Charles Rane (William Devane) and Master Sergeant Johnny Vohden (Tommy Lee Jones) return to San Antonio after suffering seven years of torture in a North Vietnamese prison. Charles' emotions are numb as his wife confesses she intends to marry another man, and he rebuffs the infatuated advances of local waitress Linda Forchet (Linda Haynes). When violent criminals invade his home causing family losses and a permanent injury, he decides to pursue his own brand of revenge, with help from Linda and Johnny.

What Works Well: This Paul Schrader story hovers between exploitive B-movie vigilantism and a searing exploration of post-war mental trauma. Primarily interested in the damaged psychology of a tortured-then-released prisoner-of-war, the pacing is deliberate and the writing sharp, director John Flynn using the few moments of uncompromising violence as exclamation marks. William Devane finds a career highlight in a role demanding devastating emotional expression through long moments of grim silence assisted by ever-present aviator sunglasses. He is ably supported by Linda Haynes representing normalcy struggling to understand a veteran's mangled mind. Tommy Lee Jones' role is small but crucial, Johnny's immediate readiness to resume the war when asked a voluminous condemnation of failed integration.

What Does Not Work As Well: The bad guys are poorly defined and reduced to interchangeable burly men, robbing Charles' quest of any worthy counterpoint. The details of the search for justice are lost in sweaty small town border canteens and a torrent of nicknames. 

Key Quote:

Linda: Why do I always get stuck with crazy men?

Charles: 'Cause that's the only kind that's left.

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Movie Review: You've Got Mail (1998)

A romantic comedy with would-be lovers on either side of the corporate fence, You've Got Mail delves into the emerging online world to update a story of virtual friends and real-world foes.

Using the online pseudonyms Shopgirl and NY152, New Yorkers Kathleen Kelly (Meg Ryan) and Joe Fox (Tom Hanks) correspond through daily emails, having met in a chat room. In the real world Kathleen owns a small children's bookstore she inherited from her mother, and is in a relationship with newspaper columnist Frank (Greg Kinnear). Joe runs the giant Fox Books megastore discount chain and is romantically attached to book publisher Patricia (Parker Posey).

With Joe about to open a new Fox Books location and drive Kathleen's store out of business, they meet and she shuns him as a heartless businessman. Meanwhile their daily emails develop into a deep friendship, until Joe discovers that his online soulmate is also his real world nemesis. He has to find a way to turn a digital romance into a true love affair.

Updating 1940's The Shop Around The Corner and taking advantage of emerging social media trends, You've Got Mail pulls off the far-fetched central premise with practised ease. Director Nora Ephron co-wrote the script with her sister Delia, and reunites with Hanks and Ryan from the 1993 hit Sleepless In Seattle. The pre-established chemistry is evident and helps navigate the bumpy patches, especially a rather prolonged final act.

The dichotomy between real-world sparring and on-line friendship drives the narrative. Ephron establishes Kathleen and Joe's physical proximity early: they navigate the same streets everyday, oblivious to each other and their digital friendship, virtually connected in a practically disconnected world. The difference in their behaviour is stark. Benefitting from on-line anonymity and a "no telling details" rule, the emails represent their truer selves, full of honesty and self-doubt. In person Kathleen's shield goes up and she understandably rails at Joe's corporateness before giving herself a chance to know him as a person.

A sparkling New York is scrubbed clean and serves as a typically idyllic rom-com backdrop. Consistent with the small store/big corporation conflict, Ephron allows street-level businesses to provide the city's heartbeat, scenes of shutters opening to start the day serving as the source of streetscape vibrancy.

Hanks and Ryan radiate star power and next-door genuineness. Although Ephron at times appears to encourage theatrically ditzy performances from both, they settle down and excel in two separate modes: in-person clashes and behind-the-keyboard narration.

Meanwhile the edges of the story are kept busy, with a strong but over-elaborate supporting cast. In addition to a funny and hyper Parker Posey as his girlfriend, Joe Fox is surrounded by a best friend (Dave Chapelle), as well as a father (Dabney Coleman) and a grandfather who both have young children. Greg Kinnear's caustic newspaper opinionist is a good match for Kathleen, and she also has three store employees (Jean Stapleton, Steve Zahn and Heather Burns) to worry about. Unsurprisingly, several of the side-characters fade away or are just unceremoniously dropped due to crowding.

But despite some well-intended bloat, You've Got Mail succeeds in parsing togetherness apart, and delivers a breezy romance.



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Movie Review: On Golden Pond (1981)

A family drama about aging, On Golden Pond examines the twilight of life through the twin lenses of enduring love and difficult forgiveness.

In New England, elderly couple Norman and Ethel Thayer (Henry Fonda and Katharine Hepburn) reopen their summer cottage on the shores of an idyllic lake known as Golden Pond. A retired professor approaching 80 years old, Norman suffers from heart palpitations and declining mental sharpness. He maintains an abrasive personality compounded by an obsession with death. Ethel is 10 years younger and in better health. They remain deeply in love and she helps smooth over his sharp edges.

Their daughter Chelsea (Jane Fonda) arrives for Norman's birthday along with her new boyfriend Bill Ray (Dabney Coleman) and his 13 year old son Billy (Doug McKeon). Chelsea and Norman have a strained relationship and cannot mend it before she leaves for Europe with Bill, leaving Billy in the care of Norman and Ethel for a month. The young teenager and old man bond over fishing, but dangers lurk in the lake and Chelsea's return will prompt more difficult conversations.

Remarkably, On Golden Pond was the first on-screen collaboration between legends Henry Fonda and Katherine Hepburn. And with Jane Fonda adding a layer of realism to the strained dynamic between father and daughter, the film's casting is near-mythical. And the stars do not disappoint. An otherwise simple story is elevated by Hepburn and Henry Fonda (in his final appearance) defining the dusk of life as a time of uncertainty, reflection, pride, impatience and plenty of love. Both deservedly won Academy Awards for their performances.

Ernest Thompson adapted his own play into a witty script and director Mark Rydell respects the theatrical origins but also displays nimbleness to keep the cameras moving. Cinematographer Billy Williams makes the most of the serene filming location at Squam Lake, New Hampshire.

Thompson invests in the aching emotional dependencies between long-term partners, and the bond of marriage between Norman and Ethel resides at the core of the story. Both know he is in declining health but he remains her lifelong rock and she refuses to partake in his incessant death talk, coaxing him to engage and at least minimize the antagonizing behaviour. 

The second key relationship develops between Norman and young Billy, and indeed they take centre stage for the entire middle act. Norman finds a fishing companion and willing learner; Billy discovers adventure on the lake, including the thrills of operating a speed boat and catching elusive trout. They make an unlikely partnership and uncover the reciprocal joys of mentorship.

Ironically the weakest subplot is between Chelsea and her father. Their dysfunctionality is superficially introduced and summarily resolved, Jane Fonda overacting and unconvincing at both ends of Chelsea's arc.

But whenever the humans stumble On Golden Pond can turn to the graceful loons, majestically swimming as couples across the lake, all the hard work of togetherness hidden below the surface.

 


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Movie Reviews: The Beverly Hillbillies (1993)

A limp comedy, The Beverly Hillbillies contains maybe two laughs and a lot of wasted talent.

In rural Arkansas, massive oilfields are discovered on the swamplands owned by widower Jed Clampett (Jim Varney). He sells the land for $1 billion, and moves with his tomboy daughter Elly May (Erika Eleniak), doofus nephew Jethro (Diedrich Bader) and crusty mother-in-law Daisy May (Cloris Leachman) to a massive mansion in Beverly Hills.

Banker Milburn Drysdale (Dabney Coleman) and his assistant Jane Hathaway (Lily Tomlin) quickly swing into action to ensure that the Clampetts remain good clients. As a result Jethro gets an undeserved position at the bank, and Jane attempts to satisfy Jed's quest for a new wife. Meanwhile, bank employee Tyler (Rob Schneider) tries to plot a way to get his hands on Jed's fortune, and sends in his girlfriend Laura Jackson (Lea Thompson) disguised as a French teacher of manners to infiltrate the family.

Based on the 1960s television sitcom, The Beverly Hillbillies is a dumb exercise in milking a familiar property well past the expiry date. Directed by Penelope Spheeris with a script mushed together by four writers but containing barely any ideas, the film is devoid of charm, humour and wit. Instead the attempted jokes remain at the sub-juvenile level, the antics maybe somewhat funny for the sheltered sub-10 year old set.

The entirety of what passes as plot is made up of bankers Drysdale, Hathaway and Tyler tripping over each other to either suck-up to the Clampetts or steal from them. The family are stock rural simpletons straight from the hinterlands as imagined for 1960s television comedy, and what may have been funny on the small screen in decades past - granny totes a shotgun! daughter is an animal loving tomboy! - has long since gone stale. Acknowledging the pathetic bankruptcy of actual ideas, Spheeris throws in some Benny Hill-style fast-forwarded group chase idiocy.

Respected actors Lily Tomlin, Cloris Leachman, Dabney Coleman and Lea Thompson generally embarrass themselves with varying degrees of over-acting, and are joined by braindead comedy regulars Varney and Schneider, who are more comfortable in these kinds of gutters. Dolly Parton, Zsa Zsa Gabor and Buddy Ebsen contribute cameos.

The only good thing that can be said about The Beverly Hillbillies is that it is mercifully short. The film comes and goes in about 90 minutes, leaving nothing behind except the stink of a talentless money grab.

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Movie Review: The Man With One Red Shoe (1985)

A bland comedy set in the domestic spy world, The Man With One Red Shoe is about nothing in particular and struggles to define a purpose.

In Morocco, CIA Deputy Director Cooper (Dabney Coleman), who covets the top job, sabotages an undercover drug operation and embarrasses CIA Director Ross (Charles Durning). Back in Washington DC, Ross is forced to testify before a Senate subcommittee, but plots his revenge against Cooper. Knowing that Cooper is tracking his every move, Ross dispatches loyal ally Brown (Edward Herrman) to the airport to liaise with a complete stranger.

Brown picks violinist Richard Drew (Tom Hanks) at random, and their brief interaction sets Cooper and his crew on a wild goose chase to find out why Drew is important. Drew is actually the victim of frequent pranks by orchestra percussionist Morris (Jim Belushi), and in return Drew is having an affair with Morris' wife Paula (Carrie Fisher). Otherwise Drew is a normal everyday guy, but Cooper's surveillance kicks into overdrive, including mobilizing the luscious agent Maddy (Lori Singer) to seduce Drew and learn his secrets.

Directed by Stan Dragoti, The Man With One Red Shoe is a remake of the 1972 French film Le Grand Blond Avec Une Chaussure Noire starring Pierre Richard. The Hollywood version enjoys slick production value and a strong cast including a young Tom Hanks, but the jokes (if they exist at all) are lame, the story is unengaging, and a void exists where meaningful plot elements and substantive characters are supposed to reside.

Drew is an innocent bystander and remains a most uninteresting central character, and Hanks can do nothing with role. Jim Belushi tries too hard as the immature friend still pulling high school level pranks, while Carrie Fisher gets one long scene in fetching leopard lingerie in a nod to her Return Of The Jedi slave outfit, but otherwise drifts aimlessly in and mostly out of the film.

Cooper and Ross contribute most of the narrative drivers in an astonishingly dreadful spy versus spy battle. Neither man is remotely likable, and who wins or who loses their petty careerist battle generates the flimsiest foundation for comedy. While Dabney Coleman and Charles Durning are fine supporting actors, they cannot carry the weight of the plot or the laughs. Lori Singer nails the role of the seductress and gets to wear a contender for the most stunning backless dress paraded on screen. She also owns the best laugh with a caught-in-the-zipper moment.

The Man With One Red Shoe doesn't so much run out of original ideas; it never had any in the first place.

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Movie Review: WarGames (1983)

A technological teen comedy romance thriller, WarGames successfully mixes genres and takes an early look at the world of young geeks and computer hacking.

At the secret Colorado base for the North American Air Defense Command (NORAD), systems engineer Dr. John McKittrick (Dabney Coleman) believes that computers should replace stress-prone humans to fulfill missile launch orders. In Seattle, high school student David Lightman (Matthew Broderick) has no interest in his classes but plenty of motivation to explore the burgeoning world of computer gaming and networks. As he starts a friendship with classmate Jennifer (Ally Sheedy), David goes looking for the latest gaming code and accidentally hacks his way into the military WOPR (War Operation Plan Response) simulation supercomputer, part of the NORAD network.

David thinks he is playing as game called Global Thermonuclear War, but WOPR was not programmed to understand the difference between scenarios and actual war, causing panic in the war room as the line between reality and simulation is lost and the US military machine is mobilized to respond to a seemingly massive attack by the USSR. David and Jennifer have to track down WOPR's reclusive creator Dr. Stephen Falken (John Wood) to try and stop the chaos.

Directed by John Badham, WarGames defies easy categorization. It's a a high school comedy, a techno-thriller, a young romance and a fulmination against military incompetence, complete with the most impressive war room set since Dr. Strangelove. It is not unexpected that some parts of the film creakily rub against each other, but overall Badham and his team of screenwriters make it work, and it has withstood the test of time remarkably well. A crackling current of irreverent, sly humour permeates the movie, Badham playing up some stereotypes with sharp wit and a quick wink.

The film is in many ways groundbreaking. David as a teenager with no interest in school but a bedroom full of computer equipment and an intrinsic ability to understand technology and circumvent security is a pioneer hacker, a milestone to a future generational shift. The portrayal of the military as an organization both harnessing the awesome power of computer technology and simultaneously wrestling with its implications and vulnerabilities remains remarkably applicable decades later. WOPR as a self-learning computer points the way to the future world of artificial intelligence. The set design is also astonishingly inventive, the NORAD headquarters a dazzling example of imagination matching future realities.

WarGames has a few chase scenes and moments of staged thrills, but primarily works its way towards more cerebral aspirations. The tragicomic character of Dr. Falken becomes a central figure, a man disenchanted with life having dedicated his career to understanding war at a deeper level than humanly possible only to suffer a devastating personal tragedy. No longer interested in winners and losers and only waiting for the one outcome, Falken slips into a father figure role for David, and doesn't so much solve the crisis as point the way. And credit goes to Badham for having the courage to allow the hot war threat to be resolved prior to revealing the film's real heart, as WOPR finally grasps the meaning of learning when it comes to war.

Matthew Broderick is perfect in the role of David Lightman, his screen persona of the lighthearted street smart misfit suitably deployed both on the domestic front and in the war room. Ally Sheedy creates the perfect girlfriend-to-be, and with help from the mischievous script she quickly turns Jennifer into a real person: fun-loving, sweaty, roguish, initially dubious of David's surreptitious computer wizardry but ultimately a helpful resource.

WarGames is both cheeky and perceptive, a clever film with a deft touch and timeless message.

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Movie Review: Nine To Five (1980)

A workplace feminist comedy, Nine To Five features an infectious sense of fun and a trio of terrific leading ladies having a blast.

Judy Bernly (Jane Fonda) is entering the workforce after raising a family and being abandoned by her cheating husband Dick (Lawrence Pressman). Judy joins Consolidated Companies as a secretary and makes friends with her supervisor Violet (Lily Tomlin), who has hit a low glass ceiling and is being bypassed for a promotion into management by her insufferable boss Franklin Hart (Dabney Coleman). Meanwhile Hart is lusting after his buxom assistant Doralee (Dolly Parton). She repeatedly fends him off, but Hart nevertheless ruins her reputation by spreading rumours that they are having an affair.

Judy, Violet and Doralee finally conclude that Hart is a "sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot", and over wine and a joint take turns fantasizing about revenge. But when their dreams of retribution suddenly and unintentionally seem to come true, the ladies first believe that they may have committed murder, then have to deal with a hostage situation while keeping the office functioning.

Financed by Fonda's production company and propelled by Parton's infectious hit title song, Nine To Five has serious fun with an important topic. Directed and co-written by Colin Higgins, the film takes on gender politics at the office with a smile, exposing the hypocrisy of a hostile environment where women are fully dependent upon and completely held back. The film is brisk, full of snappy one-liners and unafraid to speak its mind.

Sexism, harassment, no opportunities for advancement, the lack of flex time, and the absence of a daycare all make their way into the story. But Nine To Five succeeds because it avoids any sense of preachiness, keeping the mood light and allowing the issues to speak for themselves. The revenge theme hints at the boiling rage, and the missed opportunities where women's energies are burned on lamenting lack of fulfillment rather than contributing to corporate achievement.

The three women's fantasy sequence is a turning point from reality-based comedy to something resembling outright farce, and the film's second half is fully invested in a false murder sub-plot, complete with a dead body stuffed into car trunk, followed by a wild and prolonged hostage taking premise. Nine to Five strides into wacky cartoon territory, and does so triumphantly but with some compromise in the focus on the core social message.

Fonda, Tomlin and Parton create an excellent trio. Fonda as Judy is the more serious debutante into the working world, and she provides the fresh eyes into the perverted office environment. Tomlin as Violet is the veteran sufferer, perfecting her frustrated eye-rolling at the abject unfairness of a male-dominated world. Parton, in her film debut, is a revelation, finding the perfect role as the sassy target of out-of-control harassment who fights back but loses the reputational battle anyway.

Dabney Coleman's career highlight as Franklin M. Hart Jr. contributes immeasurably to the film's tone. There is nothing subtle about Hart, he is a first order management boor, and Coleman plays him as a villain worthy of lusty booing and fully deserving of the female blowback finally directed his way. Sterling Hayden makes a late appearance as the firm's chairman of the board, and Elizabeth Wilson adds to the jungle politics in the role of treacherous spy.

Humorous and ridiculous, Nine To Five delivers a prescient message: women will be innovative and successful, whether inside the office or outside it. The men will just have to decide if they are talent partners or targets.

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Movie Review: Domino (2005)

A case of all style and almost incomprehensible substance, Domino dazzles the senses in a vain attempt to cover up the lack of any meaningful content in the turgid story of a female bounty hunter.

The bloodied but defiant Domino Harvey (Keira Knightley) is being questioned by FBI agent Taryn Mills (Lucy Liu) about a $10 million heist that has gone terribly wrong. Domino recounts her life story. The daughter of actor Laurence Harvey, she was drifting through life until she joined the team of grizzled bounty hunter Ed (Mickey Rourke) and his sidekick Choco (Edgar Ramirez). Domino quickly establishes a reputation as fearless and resourceful and she catches the attention of television producer Mark Heiss (Christopher Walken), who launches a reality show about the bounty hunters despite the objections of Domino's mother Sophie (Jacqueline Bisset).

Ed's main client is bail bondsman Claremont (Delroy Lindo), whose mistress Lateesha (Mo'Nique), an employee of the Department of Motor Vehicles, needs $300,000 for her granddaughter's operation. Claremont concocts a plan to steal $10 million from Las Vegas tycoon Drake Bishop (Dabney Coleman), with the intention of having his squad of bounty hunters "recover" the money in exchange for a $300,000 finders fee. When Lateesha's illicit licensing activities land her in trouble, she unintentionally gets the teenaged children of mob boss Anthony Cigliutti (Stanley Kamel) involved in the heist. Domino and her crew get dropped into a mess of an explosive situation, starting with an armed and bloody standoff at the mobile home of getaway driver Locus Fender and his shotgun-toting mother Edna.

Director Tony Scott starts with the true story of the real Domino Harvey, but uses her only as a loose inspiration. Screenwriter Richard Kelly creates an out of control narrative that tries and fails to emulate Tarantino's intertwining multi-character story construction. Instead Scott allows his worst trickster impulses to take over, resulting in a film that calls attention to its director in every scene. Domino is a land of spaced-out narration, repeated snippets of dialogue, editing that is in turns jarring and dreamy, and vivid green and yellow colours dominating the screen.

The film's visual style is either distractingly overwrought or artistically stunning, but regardless cannot compensate for a story that is a strange mix of ludicrous and vacant. With the cardboard characters offering no wit and eliciting no sympathy, the gory violence and ridiculous shootouts carry no impact. It really does not matter who among the snide collection of lowlifes lives or dies from scene to scene. The entire reality television show sub-plot is a needless exercise in unfunny bloat, and the endlessly hesitant romance between Domino and Choco never gets past the stuttering stage. The complicated heist component of the film then arrives late and starts to veer into unfathomable territory, transforming Domino's 127 minutes of running time into a true endurance test.

Keira Knightley delivers a suitably glum performance, the rich girl who takes up big guns to compensate for an absentee famous daddy. Mickey Rourke is the only cast member trying to inject a human depth to his character, but the script offers him little to work with.

Domino is a jazzy feast for the eyes, but otherwise tumbles with an unseemly clatter.

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The Movies Of Dabney Coleman

All movies starring Dabney Coleman and reviewed on the Ace Black Movie Blog are linked below:

This Property Is Condemned (1966)

Downhill Racer (1969)

The Towering Inferno (1974)

Bite The Bullet (1975)

Midway (1976)

Rolling Thunder (1977)

Melvin And Howard (1980)

Nine To Five (1980)

On Golden Pond (1981)

Tootsie (1982)

WarGames (1983)

The Man With One Red Shoe (1985)

Dragnet (1987)

The Beverly Hillbillies (1993)

You've Got Mail (1998)

Moonlight Mile (2002)

Domino (2005)

Rules Don't Apply (2016)

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The Movie Star Index is here.

Movie Review: Tootsie (1982)

A comedy about gender politics, Tootsie delivers excellent laughs with sharp social commentary, propelled by a virtuoso Dustin Hoffman performance.

Michael Dorsey (Hoffman) is a struggling actor based in New York City. Passionate about his craft but with a reputation for being difficult to work with, Michael's career is slipping away into low-key suburban theatre productions. Desperate for a last chance at stardom, and much to the horror of his agent George (Sydney Pollack, who also directed) and room mate Jeff (Bill Murray), Michael dresses up as a woman, adopts the persona of Dorothy Michaels, and lands the part of a hospital administrator on Southwest General a tawdry but popular daytime television hospital drama.

Michael gives Dorothy an independent, feminist edge, shaking up the show and quickly becoming the toast of the town. But Michael's love life starts to get really complicated. As Dorothy places more demands on his time, he neglects potential girlfriend Sandy (Teri Garr). Meanwhile, Julie Nichols (Jessica Lange), who plays the resident tarty nurse on Southwest General, finds herself strangely attracted to Dorothy, and Julie's widower dad Les (Charles Durning) is also quite smitten with the new star. Finally, the lecherous but semi-senile John Van Horn (George Gaynes), who portrays the senior doctor on the show, sets his sights on Dorothy as his next sexual conquest.

The unusually rich screenplay (co-written by Barry Levinson and Elaine May, among others) is able to maintain focus on the hearts of three characters, as Michael, Julie and Les all undergo journeys of discovery about what really matters in their lives. With a light touch but deliberate steering by Pollack, Tootsie delves into the skirmishes between the sexes, uncovering plenty of new angles to explore.

Michael thought that transforming into Dorothy would provide a superficial career boost. Instead, Dorothy became the change agent through which Michael gains a new perspective on his relationships. Michael becomes a better human being as Dorothy, with unexpected consequences.

While Michael's dour intensity and serious mannerisms mostly turned everyone off, Dorothy demands and provides R.E.S.P.E.C.T., and as it turns out, love and affection flow smoothly and in all directions when mutual respect is a common foundation. It becomes only normal that Dorothy's honest, open, playful and forthcoming personality attracts both Julie and Les. In Julie's case the purity of the relationship almost overcomes traditional gender boundaries, while for Les, Dorothy's virtue proves to be an immediate attraction to a widower.

Dustin Hoffman delivers an extraordinary performance, measured by how quickly the make-up is forgotten, and how powerfully Dorothy's presence as a woman is established and maintained. Michael's occasional stumbles in Dorothy's heels serve not only as comic touches, but also as a reminder that there is an actor beneath all those womanly clothes.

Jessica Lange, coming off career-making but highly intense roles in The Postman Always Rings Twice and Frances, demonstrates a glow for serious humour, Julie a much more interesting role than most comedies accommodate. Julie is allowing herself to be belittled in front of the camera as the airhead nurse, and off-camera by the show's director (Dabney Coleman). Dorothy proves to be an inspiration, and maybe more, prompting Julie to change her attitude towards relationships and more importantly, towards herself. Lange won the Best Supporting Actress Academy Award, the only win from 10 nominations received by Tootsie.

Terrific depth is provided by Durning, Garr, Coleman, Pollack, and Geena Davis making her screen début in a small, barely dressed, role. Durning, in particular, finds the sadness within a jovial but lonely man looking to fill the void left by the loss of a life-long love. Bill Murray pops up unannounced as Michael's laid-back room mate, providing acrid commentary on a pantomime spiralling into an unintended life experiment.

As it turns out, sometimes a man needs to walk in the heels of a woman to better understand what being a man really means.

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Movie Review: Dragnet (1987)

An attempted comedy that falters early, Dragnet never gains the necessary thrust and spirals ever downwards in a torrent of bad jokes and predictable set-ups. Dan Aykroyd and Tom Hanks do their best to maintain watchability, but they are just about flattened by the coarse material.

Sergeant Joe Friday (Aykroyd) holds his job with the Los Angeles Police Department in the highest regard, and is extremely proud of the City, its citizens, the police force, and the rule of law. Robotic in his mannerisms and strictly by-the-book in his actions, Aykroyd has to break in a new partner, Detective Pep Streebek (Hanks). Soon they are assigned to investigate a series of bizarre crimes perpetrated by a gang calling itself P.A.G.A.N., including the theft of the entire run of the latest edition of Bait magazine, owned by porn publisher Jerry Caesar (Dabney Coleman).

Friday and Streebek infiltrate the People Against Goodness And Normalcy and find a community of anarchists engaging in ritual human sacrifices. They rescue a virgin, Connie Swail (Alexandra Paul), who recognizes the reverend Jonathan Whirley (Christopher Plummer) as the evil cult leader. Friday loses his job due to over-enthusiasm in arresting the well-respected Whirley, leaving Streebek to find a way to rescue his partner's career and stop Whirley's nefarious plot to control both smut and godliness.

Intended as either a homage or a satire of the famous television series, Dragnet works as neither. The movie struggles against a pervasive stiff dumbness that no amount of star power can remedy, the script (on which four writers laboured, including Aykroyd) failing to generate any spark or wit. The entire exercise is meant to showcase Joe Friday's by-the-book method as a source of laughter, but instead of glittering Friday locks up all the entertainment into his cement personality, leaving the movie with an icy core.

Rather than saving the day and overcoming the lack of central warmth, Tom Hanks as Streebek is given little to do, since it's difficult to play the foil for a frozen cube. In the meantime, all the events are contrived to the point of abject boredom, as director Tom Mankiewicz lurches from one unfunny set piece to the next, with humour that would not get past most eight year olds.

The few good moments are provided by the smallest roles, Christopher Plummer chewing on juicy religious connivance, Dabney Coleman enjoying a Hugh Hefner-inspired bathrobe role and Alexandra Paul spraying her lack of talent all over the screen but nevertheless having fun with a wide-eyed performance as The Virgin Connie Swail.

Dragnet conclusively thumps its head against the bottom of the barrel with a dumbfounding showdown in which an army of bad guys suddenly wield machine guns and engage S.W.A.T. teams in a massive fire fight that would make Rambo proud. The superfluous battle, utterly not in keeping with all that came before it, is just the final admission that while Dragnet may have been seeking just the facts, what it found was a floundering debacle.

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