Movie Review: Prom Night (1980)

Genre: Slasher Horror  

Director: Paul Lynch  

Starring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Leslie Nielsen  

Running Time: 93 minutes  

Synopsis: In the prologue, kids playing a cruel game of hide-and-seek in an abandoned covenant cause the death of ten year-old Robin. Six years later in the present, the now teen-aged kids are getting ready for high school graduation. Robin's sister Kim (Jamie Lee Curtis) and her brother Alex are part of the school community, and their father Mr. Hammond (Leslie Nielsen) is the principal. An escaped convict is stalking the town, an outcast student threatens violence, and Kim's nemesis Wendy has disruptive intentions. Eventually a mask-wearing assailant unleashes mayhem.

What Works Well: The opening prologue promises a level of gargoylian horror that the rest of the film never comes close to matching, but one late-in-the-day shot featuring a disembodied head deserves credit.

What Does Not Work As Well: This Canadian production is best known for featuring Jamie Lee Curtis in her prime scream queen era, but offers nothing else. The stiff actors all appear a good ten years older than their roles, the writing is lazy, and the high school environment is a tired re-hash of stereotypes. The horror scenes, when they finally arrive, are tension-free, filmed in murky darkness, and edited into a mess. Instead of delivering impact, every intended highlight is extended into boredom. Worst of all is an incessant fixation on disco dancing and bad disco music. Maybe the hidden message was all about the horror of disco's final days?

Key Quote:

Kim: You seem a little anxious, Wendy. By the way, who are you going with tonight?

Wendy: It's not who you go with, honey. It's who takes you home.

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Movie Review: City On Fire (1979)

Genre: Disaster Thriller  

Director: Alvin Rakoff  

Starring: Barry Newman, Susan Clark, Shelley Winters, Leslie Nielsen, Ava Gardner, Henry Fonda, James Franciscus  

Running Time: 106 minutes  

Synopsis: A disgruntled ex-employee sabotages an oil refinery, causing a massive firestorm that consumes the adjacent city. Mass casualties ensue, and among those caught in the flames are a heroic doctor (Barry Newman), the corrupt Mayor (Leslie Neilsen), a wealthy benefactor (Susan Clark) who has a relationship with both, a dedicated nurse (Shelley Winters), an alcoholic television news personality (Ava Gardner), her producer (James Franciscus), and the city's Fire Chief (Henry Fonda). Evacuating the main hospital becomes a focal point of rescue efforts.

What Works Well: The opening scenes are standard and inoffensive in attempting to set the context, and the set-on-fire stunt performers are excellent.

What Does Not Work As Well: This Canadian production is a dreadful attempt to join the tail end of the 1970s disaster movie parade. Almost hilariously bad but often just painful, the writing and acting are atrocious, with numerous lines of dialogue quotable as tone-deaf treasures. Leslie Neilsen unintentionally practices for his impending niche, but Henry Fonda (reciting his lines with a dead-eyed lack of conviction) and Ava Gardner (overplaying the drunken schtick) jointly win the most embarrassing prize. The production values and special effects betray a limited budget, while the final hospital evacuation sequence takes forever, and mostly features extras.

Key Quote:

Fire Chief: All it takes is one man, could be anybody... your neighbor, my neighbor... one man to destroy a city.

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Movie Review: The Naked Gun: From The Files Of Police Squad! (1988)

A crime comedy, The Naked Gun adopts a scattershot approach to humour and finds frequent hilarious highlights.

After disrupting a meeting of anti-American leaders in Beirut, detective Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen) returns to Los Angeles where his special Police Squad is placed in charge of security for the upcoming visit of Queen Elizabeth II. When his former partner detective Nordberg (O.J. Simpson) is almost killed investigating a drug shipment at the port, Drebin suspects wealthy shipping tycoon Vincent Ludwig (Ricardo Montalban) of involvement in an evil plot.

Supported by his supervisor Captain Ed Hocken (George Kennedy), Drebin initiates an affair with Ludwig's assistant Jane Spencer (Priscilla Presley) to find out what she knows. But Drebin and Jane fall truly in love, complicating the investigation. Ludwig redoubles his efforts to terminate both Nordberg and Drebin as the Queen's visit draws near.

The 1982 Police Squad! television show lasted a grand total of six episodes, but found a legacy as inspiration for big-screen madness. A combination of satire, slapstick and silliness, The Naked Gun is relentless. The writing team of Jerry and David Zucker, Jim Abrahams, and Pat Proft grabs every opportunity to throw in yet another joke is an exuberant display of more is better, and mostly it is. While of course a fair share of the intended laughs don't land, enough mayhem is generated to trample over the slow spots.

With David Zucker directing, the epic moments arrive at a fast and furious pace. The pre-credit sequence sets the stage with Drebin gate-crashing a summit of America's most notorious foes of the era. Then his first meeting with Ludwig in the businessman's lavish office instigates an awkward tangle with a rare and expensive fish. Nordberg's shooting and subsequent slow-motion collapse successfully spoofs over-elaborate movie death scenes.

The Queen's gala dinner sets-up the enduring image of Drebin's missionary rescue, and the prolonged climax at a baseball game is a laugh riot, starting with the immortal absconsion of opera singer Enrico Pallazzo and continuing through to the animated umpire exploits.

At the centre of the humour is Leslie Nielsen in imperious form, his deadpan delivery and clueless demeanour a worthy spiritual successor to Inspector Clouseau. Ricardo Montalban is an oily villain, and Priscilla Presley gets in on the fun as the breathy femme not-so-fatale.

As for plot, logic, physics, or common sense, none of it matters. The Naked Gun is fully loaded with madcap frivolity.



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Movie Review: The Amsterdam Kill (1977)

A conspiracy thriller, The Amsterdam Kill strides into the dangerous world of international drug trafficking with willing energy but limited sophistication.

In a battle to control the drug trade, several dealers are killed in Hong Kong and Amsterdam. The elderly Chung Wei (Keye Luke), based in Amsterdam, wants out of the escalating violence. He approaches former Drug Enforcement Agency agent Quinlan (Robert Mitchum) to arrange a deal for Wei to turn informant and help bring down a major drug syndicate. Quinlan hires his trusted friend Jimmy (George Cheung) to guard Wei.

Quinlan had retired under a cloud and is now suspicious of the DEA's man in Amsterdam agent Knight (Leslie Nielsen), but convinces his former Hong Kong colleagues agents Odums (Bradford Dillman) and Ridgeway (Richard Egan) to accept the deal. Wei's information is immediately compromised, causing a mounting body count. Quinlan becomes a target, and realizes corruption runs deep and he can trust no one.

A Hong Kong production from Golden Harvest, The Amsterdam Kill is late to catch up with the The French Connection bandwagon but anyway does many things well. The action and character interaction scenes are well-paced, events hop briskly between Hong Kong and Amsterdam, the story is satisfyingly complicated but remains comprehensible, artificial romantic subplots are entirely avoided, and the central character of Quinlan is afforded just enough of a dark past to justify the rough edges and frumpled look.

But this is a relatively limited budget effort, and so the supporting cast is comparatively weak and exclusively male, and all the secondary characters are stiff. However, director Robert Clouse makes the most of the available resources with plenty of short and sharp action scenes, often infused with welcome style. A rolled banknote is lit and wedged into the ear of a murder victim to set-off an explosion, Mitchum and his car are unceremoniously dunked into an Amsterdam canal, and horses run wild in an artificial water channel because the shot looks good in slow motion.

At a tired 60 years old Mitchum appears too creased for the role of an ex-agent still willing to get his hands dirty, but he makes the best of the trudge. And the compact 90 minutes of running time reach an excellent climax at a Dutch countryside nursery: Mitchum dispenses with any need for physical effort by getting behind the gears of some serious machinery and embarking on an expansive and expensive damage-causation exercise. The Amsterdam Kill lacks finesse but knocks down some walls with brute force.

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Movie Review: The Poseidon Adventure (1972)

An epic disaster-at-sea story, The Poseidon Adventure helped to ignite the 1970s catastrophe movie cycle and is one of the best examples of the genre.

It's New Year's Eve, and the ocean liner S.S. Poseidon is on a journey from New York to Athens. The passengers include fiery Reverend Frank Scott (Gene Hackman), who has a frayed relationship with the Church and encourages individuals to strongly believe in themselves first. Just after midnight an underwater earthquake in the Mediterranean unleashes a massive wave, and despite the best efforts of Captain Harrison (Leslie Nielsen), the Poseidon is struck and turned upside down, still barely afloat. The surviving passengers in the grand dining room are split on whether to stay put and wait for help, or make their way upwards nearer the surface.

Scott argues strongly that a perilous climb up towards the hull is the only path to salvation, but he convinces only a small group of passengers to follow his lead. His followers include ex-cop Mike Rogo (Ernest Borgnine) and his ex-prostitute wife Linda (Stella Stevens), teenager Susan (Pamela Sue Martin) and her bratty but knowledgeable younger brother Robin (Eric Shea), band singer Nonnie (Carol Lynley), elderly single man James Martin (Red Buttons), older married Jewish couple Manny and Belle Rosen (Jack Albertson and Shelley Winters), and crew member Acres (Roddy McDowall). They start their ascent and are barely able to stay ahead of the rising waters, while frequent explosions rock their perilous surroundings. Scott and Rogo repeatedly clash, and not all the group members will make it to the hull and the chance at a rescue.

Directed by Ronald Neame, The Poseidon Adventure was producer Irwin Allen's first big-screen success. An adaptation of the Paul Gallico book, the film closely adheres to the now familiar formula of a small group of survivors navigating their way out of a disaster zone, with many candidates lined up to win sympathy and then summarily die. The Poseidon Adventure expertly delivers the requisite mix of thrills and human drama, and invests plenty of time in rounding out its characters into relatively interesting people with distinct personalities. Reverend Scott's small flock is a surprisingly memorable group, and they add immeasurably to the film's enjoyment.

The special effects and sets are excellent for the era. Using models, camera tricks and specialty sets, Neame and his production team create a disaster zone for the ages, tipping over a massive ship, creating numerous sets filled with fires, destruction and dead bodies, plus some surreal environments just for good measure: a mammoth blue Christmas tree becomes an essential climbing structure; an upside barbershop and an upside men's bathroom add nothing to the story but are unforgettable touches. Elsewhere, the film offers up a maze of inverted hallways, shafts, staircases, catwalks and submerged rooms for the survivors to try and navigate.

The script is co-written by Stirling Silliphant and Wendell Mayes, and provides plenty of bonus fun in the form of obvious religious parallelisms with the Pilgrim's Progress. Scott is a troubled but passionate reverend, and he works hard to convince a group of strangers, a combination of saints and sinners, to become his followers before leading them up to the light. Scott even gets to drag that Christmas tree over his shoulder in a symbolic nod to the cross. On the way to the top Scott's congregation stumbles across another larger group in an almost catatonic state, following a man of science (the ship's doctor) in the wrong direction.

The cast get into the spirit and deliver wide-eyed and loud performances, suitably amplified to compete with the surreal surroundings. Ernest Borgnine goes furthest to the extremes of boorishness as ex-cop Rogo, and he gets competition from Shelley Winters as the overweight ex-swimmer trudging along with the group, waiting for her moment of divinity to float to the surface. Gene Hackman is the only bona fide current star in the group, and he keeps a straight face and intense tone as a man who finds his mission in the bowels of an upside ocean liner.

The Poseidon Adventure is irresistible Hollywood entertainment: plenty of has-beens, overturned, on fire, in the water, but always looking up.

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Movie Review: Forbidden Planet (1956)

A psychological interplanetary science fiction adventure, Forbidden Planet is an impressive romp through the galaxies, briskly paced but without fully avoiding all the space debris.

In the distant future, humanity has conquered travel at multiples of light speed and colonized deep space. Commander John J. Adams (Leslie Nielsen) captains United Planets Cruiser C57-D towards Altair IV, a distant desert-like planet with a life-sustaining atmosphere. Adams' mission is to discover the fate of the Bellerophon expedition that landed on Altair twenty years prior, but subsequently lost contact with Earth. Approaching the planet, Adams makes contact with Dr. Edward Morbius (Walter Pidgeon), a language expert and apparently the only survivor from the Bellerophon. Morbius warns Adams to stay away from Altair, but the commander insists on landing anyway.

Once on the ground, Adams and his crew meet the resourceful Robby the Robot, who escorts them to Morbius' compound. The scientist explains that an unknown force killed all the other members of the expedition but spared Morbius and his wife, and she subsequently died of natural causes. Morbius now lives with his daughter Alta (Anne Francis), and her innocent sexuality and skimpy outfits cause havoc among Adams' companionship-starved crewmen. Morbius is studying the scripts and inventions left behind by the Krell, a technologically advanced but now extinct race that used to inhabit Altair. With Alta falling in love with Adams, a rampaging, indestructible and invisible monster attacks C57-D and its crew, forcing Adams to untangle the secrets of Morbius and the Krell.

An entertaining gallop to the inner recesses of space and the human mind, Forbidden Planet boasts good special effects for the era, and a combination of wonder, science and mental sparring. Walter Pidgeon dominates his surroundings with a towering, almost theatrical performance as a scientist engrossed in studying superior works, and now with a mental capacity far ahead of his race. The eternally cute Robby the Robot, created by Morbius thanks to his learnings from the Krell, earns his cinematic legend as an essential member of the cast.

Despite the many highlights, the film is not without weaknesses, and director Fred M. Wilcox, working from Cyril Hume's script, sometimes struggles to find the right balance amongst all the puzzle pieces. Once C57-D lands on Altair, too much time is invested in sex-deprived men lusting after Alta. The scenes featuring Adams and his Lieutenant "Doc" Ostrow (Warren Stevens) clumsily wooing Alta or castigating her for wearing what she likes are creaky in the extreme and have not aged well. The cast is mostly stuck in 1950s earnest stiffness, Leslie Nielsen failing to add any sort of nuance to Commander Adams and his crewmates playing their role straight out of a World War Two naval deployment.

The film hits its peak with the introduction of the Krell technology, Morbius unveiling the massive machinery, inexhaustible power supply, and intelligence-enhancing inventions left behind by the ancient race. The battle with the monster as it attacks the spaceship is another highlight, the special effects team creating a virtual rampaging presence, able to withstand everything that Adams' defensive batteries can throw at it.

The final explanation linking the monster, the Krell and Morbius is rushed, perhaps to avoid any unnecessary scrutiny as unconstrained scientific achievements collide with the in-built frailties of both the Krell and human minds. The climax is satisfying nonetheless, Forbidden Planet ending with a literal and figurative bang. Traveling in space is dangerous, but the dark secrets of the brain could be as treacherous as any intergalactic expedition.

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